being a twelve part study on the propagation of waves in near vacuum realities, or, why is willingness important to rain.
heaven’s open.
touch. real thirst.
resist. learning loud.
illuminate.
open mouth. drink.
neil reid © july 2012
comments:
Prompt says, Simply, write a poem that uses twelve (12) words, no more, no less.
Mind, the prompt says, “a poem” of twelve words, but nothing about the title length! (My odd sense of humor perhaps. No pretense of a rule too small to be ignored.) And yes of course, it sets the stage for the poem that follows (which is fair I think!).
Actually, more interesting than I’d expected it to be. Neither so easy nor unrewarding, this brevity thing. (And I bypassed the few questionably clever tricks I’d thought to employ, because there is something in allowing words to have their own “space” to fill. Certainly could have made connections more obvious, tighter threads, but I delighted in the wavering connections in this most Spartan mode.) Worth doing more.
Written for the We Write Poems prompt #115, Counting fingers plus two.
Neil, I love your word choices. This works perfectly. I am a big fan of the type of writing now, thanks for the prompt.
Pamela
Thanks Pamela. You’ve been missed. Think I appreciate too what this sparse form has shown to me (although I’m too verbose to more than visit it from time to time!). But we will do it again I think.
Yours was very interesting too. Good strong words.
Secret Neil? This post is the very thing that caught my eye and wouldn’t let go until I tried the prompt. I came back several times to reread this and each time found different things that drew me back again. I’ve been away far too long and this feels soo good and sooo right. Thank you my friend.
Elizabeth
I enjoyed this and can tell you liked the prompt. I actually had to think about where to add my final word, having only eleven for the longest time. Writing between our usual and something different (in my case brief to longer) is a good exercise, I think. I love best the meaning-heaviness of each of your words.
I love how each word counts for so much — which is, of course, the point of a 12 word poem. I think the spacing you used works very well too. It adds weight to the words.
Makes me thirst for more!
Yousei has hit the nail on the head. Each of the 12 words is highly significant.
I did as you did, and made a twelve word title!
“why is willingness important to rain.” I like this and “learning loud,” deep meaning behind your brevity.
The ending, “Open mouth. Drink.” Loved this, the illumination of the soul. I do believe this was a good exercise for all of us, if only to pare down the non-essentials. And I am known for sometimes venturing into Ancient Mariner territory, especially with social justice rants, ha! Thanks, Neil. Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/07/25/twofer-gathering-and-a-limerick/
“Meaning-heaviness” to borrow Yousei’s phrase, so the twelve words rain with gravity, and a heavyweight title to boot. It’s also amazing that it can be read and re-read.
Sometimes I do wonder, why we bother to write at all. But words are really kinetic.
Neil, I think the first and last words tie this poem into a neat bow: Heaven and Drink. Masterful use of the prompt; open enough to insert one’s own thoughts. Thanks, Neil. Peace, Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/07/25/twofer-gathering-and-a-limerick/
love this!